Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Domestic Abilities

I’ve been called “ambitious” many times in my life for reasons I don’t quite understand. I mean that I don’t know that I am ambitious any more than anyone else is.

Well, I’ve said a few times already that I want to be married someday- that’s an ambition. I don’t have a lot of details about what I would like for my wedding; I definitely want the marriage more.

In relation to having a marriage, I think I would enjoy being a domestic manager, i.e. a housewife. I look forward to being able to “make a house a home.” Towards that end, below is a list of skills I have [or am working on] that could be used to recommend me for such a position. I could do all this just for myself [and I do], as a single person living on my own, but these abilities are more attractive to me in the context of doing them for someone else.

1. Washing Dishes: I do not enjoy doing dishes because my mind thinks that I’ll never get them clean enough, but I will do them because I don’t believe that the dishwashing machine will do a better job. Don’t worry, these recommendations will get better.

2. Laundry: I love doing laundry! It’s the scent of freshly washed and dried laundry. The only cautions here are that I don’t care enough to pay attention to “hand wash only” instructions or “delicates” designations, but that would mostly have to do with my clothes rather than his. And his “delicates” would be things like a well-tailored suit, which would probably go to the dry cleaners. I like putting away laundry. Folding laundry… is okay, I’ll do it.

3. Cooking: I cannot wait to have my own kitchen to cook in. I like having the small bowls to get out and pre-measure ingredients, like they do in cooking shows. I do sometimes stray from recipe directions, and sometimes doing without recipes all together. I would like to learn how to better plan out meals ahead of time. I also like doing the grocery shopping.

4. Financial Tracking: for years, I’ve been working out a system to best help me keep track of finances. I would like to learn to pay bills in a good manner. When I worked more, I got a little enjoyment from putting a portion of my paycheck into paying a bill, but I only had a phone bill and credit card bill to take care of.

While I like some of the finer things, like a Betsey Johnson dress or a glass of delicious cognac, I don’t need them to feel good. I’d rather save up money towards more fulfilling things like spending a lunch with a good friend, tithing, donating to charity, catching a game in person with friends, buying for a friend something they really want. So when it comes time for a family, I think I could have a good balance between saving, giving, and spending some for ourselves.

5. Decorating: ohmigoodness. I cannot wait for this also. Over the last few years, I’ve made my own improvements to my room. I planned out and put up bookshelves. I’ve finally settled on a general room set up that I love. I built up my own closet system. I made shades for the windows [they’re not completely finished yet]. I set aside an area for the cat toys and bed, though realistically, the cats go wherever they want and leave their toys everywhere. I have ideas for more decorating projects.

When I lived in OR, I coordinated the bathroom. I was only going to be there for 5 ½ months, so I didn’t want to do too much. I figured that the bathroom would be a place of relaxation at bath time and so worthy of some coordination. I picked out the colors [yellow, green, white] and got bath stuff in that scheme. It still wasn’t much, but it was enough for the time.

6. Home repairs: I know how to do some stuff like fixing window screens, painting, changing out fixtures, building shelves, putting up siding, installing doors, etc. I’d like to learn how to do minor plumbing repairs, tiling, etc. I could learn electrical stuff, though I’m more cautiously hesitant in that than in most other areas. I enjoy doing stuff like repairs.

Somewhat related: car maintenance. I know a few basics like checking tire pressure and liquid levels. I know how to change a tire, although sometimes being able to remove the nuts on my own can be a problem, strength-wise. I’d like to learn more about working on cars. I think I would have enjoyed being a mechanic.

7. Working from home: I have many interests and endeavors that it’s difficult for me to imagine being a “career woman” in the greater corporate company sense. Even if I become a full time architect, what is attractive about that idea to me is that sometimes, one can negotiate working from home [I’d probably only do so if I have a family]. Don’t misunderstand: I am not against having to go in to the office every day. I just like the potential for flexibility.

Anyways, a lot of my endeavors are things that could be done at a store or from home; they could be flexible in execution. For instance, I would like to get deeper in jewelry-making; that could be turned into a business from home. I could be a home-decorating consultant. I’d like to try my hand in graphic design. I could be a tutor in several subjects. I could become a babysitter like my mom did for other families in the apartment building when I was younger.

Combining home repairs with ministry, I could start a ministry in which I get to know my neighbors and offer my home repair services, no charge for labor, probably have them pay for parts though, and if/when they seem receptive, I could share my faith with them. Okay, this isn’t so much a business or income-generating type of work, but it could be something for me to do.

I know that a marriage is more than a list of chores, but I don’t have to fit everything on a topic into one entry. And when it comes to actually being married, I recognize that hubby and I will have to talk about who’s in charge of doing what. I seem to have a more adaptable nature than others; it could be that I end up doing very few of the above things, I’m even open to the idea that he might want to be a stay-at-home dad. I think the only thing I will definitely want an active part in is the decorating, room-arranging department.

And being that I haven’t done much babysitting, I didn’t want to list child-rearing as an ability that I have to contribute to a marriage yet. I do want to have children. That’s a different entry.

Mahalo for reading.

[Photo 1: my sanctuary in OR]
[Photo 2: my bedroom in OR. See how bare essentials it was compared to the bathroom? :) ]

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