Monday, March 22, 2010

PATER-nal Instincts

Friend and I were discussing MBTI. I’m not gonna give away this Friend’s identity so I’ll type about myself. Supposedly I am an INTP. All tests, even taken a year apart, point to INTP. I question it and yet questioning it is apparently the nature of an INTP.

Friend talked about the nurturing nature generally associated with the feminine, the maternal instincts. It was related to the MBTI, I’m sure it must’ve been because all of our conversational detours make sense….

I started thinking that I must have more paternal-like protector instincts. My mind screams out, “You mess with one of mine, I’m gonna mess with you and yours.” And then, “After you cry, maybe I’ll give you a hug reassuring you that you’re still a good person.”
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Here are my examples:

#1: Neo scraped his knee playing soccer. The most maternal I got was to buy non-stick gauze pads and that tape that wouldn’t pull out his leg hairs. Then I just handed it to him. I don’t remember patching up his boo-boo for him; I’m thinking that I gave him the stuff and he had to patch it for himself. Being a Mama’s Boy to a nurse, he probably expected me to patch him up, in which case I probably did but I really don’t remember doing that.

Oh, and I did his laundry once. Only because I wasn’t going to drop it off at Mama’s house for her to do it like Neo asked me to. It felt wrong and Mama had all boys, you know what I’m saying.

#2: Snow Princess was talking with someone at their desk. A few of the guys were around. Web decides to use the stick in his hand to play with the bottom of Snow Princess’s skirt.

As soon as I saw that, I grabbed the stick from Web and gave him a talking to. Web is from Africa, about 6’3” muscled. I didn’t care, he was gonna learn something.

#3: I got a flat tire and moved to the side of the freeway. I began working on the tire. When this Neon full of guys stopped to help us, I told the Don [female] to stay in the car with the phone and call my dad if something happened. She got out of the car- it annoyed me! Thank God, nothing happened.

#4: When I drop people off, I wait until they get inside before driving off. I will walk people to their cars and make sure the car starts and then walk myself to my car. When I lived in Marin, I thought nothing of taking public transportation and then walking into Oakland and then back again at night 3 days a week by myself. I walk in the back of the group to make sure the group is all together. I like to wait until everyone else has gotten their food before I make a plate for myself.
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I do have maternal-nurturing instincts, they’re just latent. Past examples elude my typing at the moment, but I do have a strong sense that I would like to be a wife and mother. I want to be a housewife, even if I have an outside job- it makes sense to me. I want to make a house a home, nurture the kids, cook most of the meals, etc.

I don’t know if the stronger protector instincts are due to my nature or how I was nurtured. Dad is very much the protector with some nurturer. Mom …isn’t much of either, unless I’m sick and then she might nurture me.

Also, I think this relates to my dating choices. Hmmm… message me if you wanna know more about this one; I don’t know yet if I wanna release this info or not.

Are you a Nurturer or a Protector? What are you on the MBTI?

Mahalo for reading!