Friday, January 8, 2010

Chameleon

My friend was telling me about a study done regarding the chain reaction yawning phenomenon. I think she said something about it being more likely to be carried on by empathetic people.

When we took the SHAPE profile thing, it said that I would like to help people “develop authentic, Christ-centered relationships with others.” At first, I thought that might be wrong, but maybe it is true. Except for an interest in observing people, I don’t really think of myself as a relational kind of person. I think of myself as socially awkward, so how would I help others in relating when I have trouble relating? Plus, I tend to have short-term relationships so I think I’m relationally-challenged.

Though, some of my friends think that I am good at relating. Putting some things together, maybe I am more empathetic than I thought, though I can’t know if I perpetuate the yawning experiment findings.

So, for one, in certain areas, I tend to be an auditory learner. I dislike communicating by email or texting because I get easily confused, I’m sure the receiver is gonna interpret my “tone” incorrectly; though I tend to default the “tone” in emails and texts as… docile, non-threatening, in the best tone possible? As in, someone could mean to be a jerk to me or sneering or something and I just wouldn’t pick up on it.

When I played in band, I could play a piece better after having heard what it is supposed to sound like. I attended a clarinet clinic one summer, led by Mr. Hasuko whom was a band/clarinet teacher. He would play a section and then have me play the same section afterwards and I would improve very much compared to just trying to focus on finger position and such.

When I am around people with a certain speech… pattern? I tend to speak more like they do. If I am around people who speak pidgin, I will speak more pidgin. Normally, I speak mostly proper English. If someone is fond of saying a particular word or phrase, I tend to say it more frequently. “LOSE MONEY!” Sorry, just remembered something, haha!

I enjoy getting into something someone else is into, like musical artists, movies, activities, etc. I got into Foo Fighters because of Ripple and the “Say you love crepes” movie because of Joker. I started liking the VW Golf because that’s what Handsome drove. I started really liking and wearing yellow because Chimichonga was wearing yellow and it looked so good on her. To be honest, I could get into video games, but it’s not easy when I don’t have gaming systems myself and lots of chances to improve; I think I’d be really good at them. I was getting good at Nintendo stuff when I was dating Dimples.

And I love getting others into things. I think I got Apple into Coffee Bean and I like suggesting books for her to read. Before CB came to HI, I got Spine into Caramel Fraps from Starbucks. Hmmm, I dunno what else….

Am I off topic now? Anyways, “chameleon” because I think I adapt well in most places and situations. Nothing really fazes me, like how different and “out there” people are. I enjoy the individuality of people. One thing though is that I don’t enjoy being around overly cruel, fake, condescending people; I will make efforts to get to know the true them but after awhile if mostly what I’m getting is a negative vibe and I can’t positively influence them, I will move on. I’d rather not adapt to that. I’m not saying that I’m a positive influence on people, I don’t know that, but I’d like to be.

Huh. I guess that’s why people tend to think I favor certain people or that I like someone romantically when I just like them. I enjoy affirming who people are. I enjoy being around positive energies and I love being around intelligent/ passionate/ talented people. Oh, this probably adds to why I like dealing with individuals rather than a large group.

So maybe I am more empathetic and relational than I thought. Am I? Any suggestions on using it for good rather than evil?