Wednesday, September 2, 2009

It's Gonna Be Worth It...Right?!

Last night we had a ministry meeting with our current young adult friends. *deep breath, sigh.* I am discouraged, I am encouraged, and I am so very grateful.

I knew it was coming but it materialized fully at the meeting. I’m gonna need to lead actual people. I don’t know if I can do this but if God’s called me to it, I’m trusting he’ll provide. Oh how the difficulties pile up!

The group we’re starting with is made up of several strong personalities; I’m one of them! I’m discouraged by the lack of enthusiasm or undiscernable support of a few. Some actions have been disrespectful from my point of view. Maybe I just care too much. The three of us are showing that we care and care enough to do something. I’m not looking to be praised for it but I really don’t want to be beat down for it either.

I guess I just gotta toughen up, I don’t know. I think I’m plenty tough as it is. I’m alright about someone saying I’m a joke or whatever, just say it to my face.
So instead, I’m trying to focus on the encouragement that my other friends have been giving.

They’re so sweet, my women. They’re so dear to me. How can I let them down? No, I’ve got to keep going for them. I wanna do a good job because of them.

Even some of the guys, I can sense their support even when they’re being funny about it. I mean, Extra Large is one of the youngest guys and his personality, he’s not gonna say, “Yes, Jenn, whatever you say.” He said things in a humorous way but I can tell we have his support.

And I know Sir well enough to know that if he didn’t care at all, he wouldn’t have asked the questions he did or give the good insight he often has. He could have just come to hang out with the guys but no, he was fully involved in the meeting. I’m serious about this ministry and he didn’t make a joke of it.
That was just a few examples of the support of our friends. They’re so wonderful, they’re a big part of why I wanted to do this ministry in the first place. I am so grateful for them, thank you GOD! :)

Please continue praying for us. Please pray that this be a good training/ learning experience for me as a leader, especially in learning to be a good leader to those for whom I’m reluctant to care more. God’s calling me to lead young adults, not to lead my young adult friends.

Mahalo for reading.