Friday, March 6, 2009

Whoa! KIDS!! And Small Concerns

On Thursdays, we have a program for the Youth and Outreach Departments at church called WAMM [With All My Mind]. It’s meant to be a tutoring and spiritual growth program, I would say.

Anyways, this past WAMM, we had more than our usual numbers. On top of the kids that regularly come, we had ~15 more! Kids everywhere! It was good to see.

WAMM regular activities include: a tutorial/study hall session, dinner, and small groups.
Other activities include: a fun activity [competitions, skits, food challenge, etc.] and a reading time.

For dinner, we’d like to have different persons or families to volunteer to bring a dish and join us for the meal. Any volunteers out there? :D

We’ve had the joy of having one of our young adults come out and plan some activities for WAMM. Everett studies in WA but was on island for a few months for an internship. It has been a blessing to have someone come out and help, even for a temporary stayover. Everett goes back to WA later this week. MAHALO Everett and God bless!

Personally for me, I’ve been going through some stuff lately that I don’t quite know how to express. At the moment, WAMM can be both a blessing and a tiring thing for me. I continue to show up for many reasons, mainly because it is a time for seeking more closeness with God. That is the best way I know of explaining it. I suppose it is that I believe God wants me there and from that I can trust that the blessings will outweigh the tiredness, and they have.

I’m a little confused on one thing that I will try to explain now. I enjoy being with the younger kids; they bring such joy to me. Though, when it comes to the small groups time, I hesitate to take the younger kids. I’m trying to break my thinking that I am a good one-on-one person to become more all-around, to strengthen my group skills.

My personal want [I’m not sensing a strong guidance from God either way] is to lead a small group of young people whom I can challenge to a deeper faith or better understanding. Not that the younger kids cannot be challenged in that way, but that I wanna be able to evaluate somewhat how the group is growing, something that is difficult to tell with the younger kids.

And then, the older kids tend to be the ones that tire me out. The attitudes. The pretending not to hear me. The reluctance to participate. I am trying to find a balance to patience and discipline, I suppose; I don’t know how to put it exactly. If they were my own kids, I wouldn’t take any attitude at all; that’s how I was raised…and kept in line.

One of the older kids that I seem to be developing a trust with, is one of the homeschooled in the Sunday class. It’s been great to seeing this happen and being in it, but she’s the daughter of a church leader and is busy with so many other activities…. Does she need a small group leader?

So what is difficult is that all the older kids have a leader assigned to them; whether they attend small group or not is a different thing. The younger kids need a leader and so I have been assigned to them. I want to be where there is a need. I like having the younger kids; I’m just concerned that I’m not gifted for them. Or do I continue to try and so develop it?

Could I make time to have the younger kids on Thursdays and possibly an older group on another day?

Oh my.

And all these thoughts and dealings with all the kids, makes me wonder about having my own kids [hopefully] someday. I still want kids, catch that more than one. I definitely do not want more than a set of twins at one time; I doubt I could handle more than that and I don’t think much of in vitro fertilization, I’m not gonna mess with that so I think I’ll be okay. Do I really think I’ll be a good mother?!

Well, I suppose I’ll work on that as the situation comes.

Yeah, well. That’s it for now.

Mahalo for reading!

More images from the past WAMM
[pics coming up soon, blogger's lagging at the moment]