Flower Drum Song on Amazon.com
I'm strictly a female female
And my future I hope will be
In the home of a brave and free male
Who’ll enjoy being a guy having a girl
Those are lyrics from the song whose title inspired this entry. The song is from the musical Flower Drum Song. I recently watched the movie again and I still enjoy it. I especially enjoy how Nancy Kwan, in the role of Linda Low, moves so femininely while she sings this song, because in all my gracefulness I don’t know that I could ever be that feminine in my movements. I’ll hafta practice it.
I do enjoy being a girl, well, a woman now. I went through a period of growing up when I didn’t want to wear skirts and dresses, I didn’t like pink, but I enjoyed being a girl. When I was much younger, I played in the dirt, chased the boys [literally, not romantically], caught bugs and geckos, but I enjoyed being a girl. If my brother was climbing a tree, I wanted to be on the next branch.
I could go on and on about how un-girly-girl I still am but instead, I want to remain in the spirit of the title and list some of the ways in which I am still girly and enjoying it [in no particular order].
1. I hate roaches! I really hate roaches!
They may be the one thing that will make me scream like a girl. I can handle spiders, geckos, mice, etc., but I hate roaches. They are dirty, they can’t keep away from my food, they’re huge, and they’re everywhere! What’s the worst is that in Hawai‘i, da’ buggahs fly atcha! It’s like they can smell fear. I can’t go a week without stepping into the shower and having flashbacks of the “Bird on a Wire” shower scene. If I am ever to marry, I am gladly leaving all roach killing and disposal duties to hubby. I don’t even wanna touch a dead one! Maybe I shouldn’t have started with this one ‘cuz it doesn’t sound like enjoyment, but I just really don’t like roaches.
2. I’m all for chivalry.
Open the door for me, pull out my chair for me, I love all of that. A man doing that for me by no means diminishes my ability to do those things for myself. It in no way says to me that the man thinks he’s better than me. What it does say to me is that he values me, he wants to honor me. Give me the knight on his white horse [I like the ending for “Deliver Us from Eva”], give me a Ponderosa Cartwright, give me Bert from “Mary Poppins.”
I was raised on such manners. My brother never lets a female in their group walk to her car alone at night. He teaches his male friends to do the same, making sure that each female gets into her car safely, that her car starts up. When I am out with just the girls and no male is with us, I will do the same because I was raised to look after the safety of my friends; I don’t think we can ever do enough of that.
And believe me, I am mindful of guys who do and do not do such things. A guy who takes care of his mother is more attractive than a brilliant smile. I had a friend who would always pay for my meal. My friends tried to convince him not to do so since he and I were just friends, not dating, but I loved it. I would have promoted him to all my female friends, if he hadn’t already known all of my friends. He had a good chance of getting a “yes” out of me if he had asked me on a date. I had another friend who didn’t pay for my meal. Someone we were with pointed it out, scolding him for not paying. It was the same thing, we weren’t dating and so I didn’t care that he didn’t pay, but I would have thought a lot more of him if he had.
It isn’t about getting free food or whether or not I have money of my own but about how much a man values me. One last example, I got a flat while on the freeway late one night. A group of guys in a car saw me on the side of the freeway and came back around to help me. I loved it! That was the first and only time that’s happened to me where someone stopped to see if I needed help. I was so appreciative of it, because while I know how to change a flat, I don’t have the muscle to do all of it on my own. I would’ve loved it more if the guys knew how to change a flat in the first place, but it was great!
I would love a woodworking shop of my own with miter saws and circular saws and clamps and drills and the whole bit; that is a kind of craft. But I also love the more feminine crafts. I make cards, jewelry, artwork…. I’ll add stickers or a stamp to cards or letters that I write.
I have sold a few pieces of jewelry that I had made. I still need a name for my jewelry business; I wanna make it more official. Anyone got any ideas? “J.lo”’s already taken….
I would love to sew my own clothes, if I were better at sewing. I try sewing small things here and there. So far, I have sewn pillow covers, bags, and roman shades [unfinished]. I still use one of the bags I made and will get a compliment on it every so often.
I don’t know that I’ll ever get into crocheting, but I hear Vanna White crochets a lot….
4. I love getting all dressed up.
For daily wear, I am more comfortable in pants, but I love dressing up for church, special occasions, or dates. I love having an opportunity to put on makeup [even though I don’t really know how I’m supposed to do it], to make my hair look nice [although I have no idea what I’m doing], to think about an outfit to wear [even though I suck at putting one together]. I like looking good in a dress or wearing a sweater. I like adding an accessory. If I think about it and I have the time, I’ll paint my nails. I love wearing perfume.
I love wearing dresses now. I mean, they’re so easy, it’s one piece; I just slip it on and I’m done. No having to match a top and bottom!
I don’t like having to shave my legs, but I’m blessed with very unnoticeable leg hair. I do like the smoothness of my legs after shaving them; I just don’t like shaving. Stop looking at my legs!
5. Chick flicks
“Ever After,” “In Her Shoes,” “The Story of Us,” “While You Were Sleeping,” I like good chick flicks. I like a good laugh, a good cry, and if they happen at the same time, it’s absolutely wonderful! I like the goofiness yet vulnerability of Drew Barrymore in “Never Been Kissed.” I like the interplay between Chow Yun Fat and Jodie Foster in “Anna and the King.”
I’m not into all chick flicks. I’m not really into “Thelma & Louise,” no matter how many Brad Pitt scenes are in it, I don’t know why. That’s the only one that comes to mind at the moment. But most chick flicks/romantic comedies with Sandra Bullock or Reese Witherspoon are good. I say “most” because I can’t say that I’ve seen them all. Contrary to the content of this entry, I haven’t seen a lot of movies.
6. I’ve made peace with pink
Well, I’m friends with most colors now; not lavender, not periwinkle, not lime, but most any other color. And I love pink. I will unabashedly wear pink. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a “Legally Blonde” pink lover, but a lot of things just look good in pink. It does wonders for my complexion and Pink’s got an enviably fit figure. Well, my mom’s relieved because I went through jr. and high school mostly wearing white, black, blue and gray.
7. I love taking baths
I don’t mind getting dirty and sweaty, by working in the yard, hiking, or camping, etc. I’m not THAT girly. But I love the bath afterwards, getting clean and relaxing. I’m waiting for my own house with a claw foot tub or freestanding tub or something like Kohler’s Purist to try the whole bath salts and candlelight baths. For now it’s a lot more of refreshing good showers.
[Sorry, I’m laughing a little ‘cuz my computer just went from Janet’s “Rhythm Nation” to Mozart’s “Serenade in G. It was a strange switch.]
When I was in CA, I volunteered weekends with HFH in Oakland. It was about a 2-hour commute on bus, BART and on foot [imagine a small Asian girl walking into Oakland by herself early in the morning while everyone else is getting out], 7-hour workday, then a 2-hour commute back home. I’d come back trailing sawdust and sheetrock dust and cuts and bruises and who knows what else. Environmentalists out there aren’t gonna like me saying this but I took liberties with bathing after days like those. Besides, I didn’t have to pay the water bill.
Not many people have ever seen me cry, but I do like to cry. As I mentioned in the “Chick flick” section, I’d rather cry while laughing. In any way, I do feel better after I’ve let everything out. Sometimes I’ll cry without being cognizant of a reason to cry. It’s just good.
9. Watching all the UH Warrior Volleyball I want
So, men’s volleyball, good stuff! A part of me really does admire the athleticism and talent of the players and the quickness and precision of the game. The other part of me just likes watching guys in sports. I mean, I can watch Wahine VB and Wahine soccer, but I like watching the guys be guys in competition. I can watch football and basketball, which are still primarily men’s sports, but volleyball is my favorite. So, what’s better than Warrior Volleyball? Or should I start calling it Kane Volleyball? Besides, the beer and garlic fries don’t hurt.
I was trying to get to 10 things, but I like the number 9. After this I’d feel like I’m stretching things because I’m not very girly and some things I’m just not gonna talk about! Talking about showering is racy enough for me at the moment. Enjoy!
*By the way, I dreamt that I was in a good relationship with a guy named Guy, very tall, strong, and well-mannered. It didn’t feel like a prophetic dream, but if you know him, could you give him my number? *wink* If he’s not in Hawai‘i, I’m in no hurry; just so he knows I’m here!